stream of consciousness ness ness ness

california's cold

California’s cold,
Just thought that i would warn ya,
In case you didn’t know.
In case you ever want to go that way.
It’s not as perfect as they say.

I’d cross the sky to get to you
Past all the lights in heaven
And the black holes I see through
In case you ever want to fly away
It’s not as perfect as they say.


THIS WHOLE DAMN PLACE IS BURNING
AND I’M STILL COLD
I’ve got nothing to show for myself.
It’s just the skin that’s on my bones.

DON’T FORGET THIS DEAR
I’LL BE HERE TO REMIND YOU
WHEN YOUR DAYLIGHT DISAPPEARS
BUT in case you ever want to head my way
Well I’m not as perfect as they say.

-gl/bh 2009

a tree’s shadow paints these walls now

where your head used to hang

dogs bark

the stars fall down

whenever the winds choose to change

fireflies bounce in the dark

throwing sparks

puppets on strings

you move them all

you move them all

you move us all

little princess with golden wings

-bh 2009

The Wind is ghosting around the house tonight
and as I lean against the door of sleep
I begin to think about the first person to dream,
how quiet he must have seemed the next morning

as the others stood around the fire
draped in the skins of animals
talking to each other only in vowels,
for this was long before the invention of consonants.

He might have gone off by himself to sit
on a rock and look into the mist of a lake
as he tried to tell himself what had happened,
how he had gone somewhere without going,

how he had put his arms around the neck
of a beast that the others could touch
only after they had killed it with stones,
how he felt its breath on his bare neck.

Then again, the first dream could have come
to a woman, though she would behave,
I suppose, much the same way,
moving off by herself to be alone near water,

except that the curve of her young shoulders
and the tilt of her downcast head
would make her appear to be terribly alone,
and if you were there to notice this,

you might have gone down as the first person
to ever fall in love with the sadness of another.

- Billy Collins

say goodbye to Hollywood

It’s a strange circumstance that life has me in right now.

I’m sitting in a weird, lonely house on Christmas Eve while a blizzard engulfs everything outside.

Most things in my life seem to be looming right now. Like the pearly gates of Heaven seem to loom over a life well spent.

I’m expectant.

Everything doesn’t seem so bad, overall. I’m just ready for a change. An uncomfortable, weird, faith-based change in life.

Some strings need to be cut. Some things need to be evaluated and preserved.

Right now, I feel like the hardest part of a big change in life isn’t the actual change itself, but rather, the steps leading up.

Let us not be flippant as we pack up our lives while we approach changes. Some things should make the trip and some things should be packed up and left in storage for another day.

I’m scared a little. Mostly hopeful.

I just now realized why my new album was recorded. the proof is in the process… i’m moving onto the next stage now finally in life. Thanks art.